hello, dolly monologue

And it just defies all reason. Youre starting to feel like a woman and believe it or not soon youll understand what its like to be in love. Over the wretched? Horace: I'm going to march in the 14th street parade with the only kind of people I can trust, 700 men. The change of climate from East Tennessee to the Delta weakened resistance I had a little temperature all the time not enough to be serious just enough to make me restless and giddy. I find actors always have great dramatic pieces on their casting profiles, or at auditions, but rarely have a great comic monologue. Quotes." But heres the thing, I tried college for a year. But I should tell you right off the bat this is not going anywhere. Cos I mean, if I thought the rest of my life would be spent as a mindless cog in a machine, I swear Id just get a tattoo across my face that says: Really man? Just need to figure out a way of growing up without becoming a boring adult. Dotty: Dolly Levi: Mr. Kemper, do you mind if we go inside? Actual slap. Now it's simple, right foot, touch, left foot, touch, under, back, around, touch. Do it! But I dont say that. I can lie here for hours thinking about him. When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married. What? Heather: You know? The original play "Hello Dolly" was adapted from. If elected I promise that I will pray more often. file Hello Dolly Monologue Minnie Fay Book Free Download PDF at Our eBook Library. Join StageAgent today and unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. For instance, okay, junior year I dated this girl, Sue Hornick. Lon: What are you ashamed that we did it? I love you madly. But the problem is.despite every fact I can muster, theres something that still doesnt check out. They just don't make musicals like this any more. I wish I was joking, but Im not. There are some who would be grateful for that--the plot is but a flimsy excuse to string together song and dance numbers. Tim: To get you started, here are 10 top monologues for auditions. Henry: An Im delighted, like, that I dont have cancer cancer of the missin ball, an Im thinkin Ive a great story for the lads if ever I had the nerve to tell them, but all Im thinkin is, Am I fertile or not? He clears his throat, brings his hand to his mouth and coughs: Walk of shame. Just so I can ride on the same bus with him. And all of a sudden I didnt know who I was anymore. I dont know what it is with me lately but I just get so UGH! So, the cops got me and Im sent to the shrink. Head over heels. Foul is most foul, being foul to be a scoffer. Then, in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend, Kyle, who was totally gorgeous but he moved to Indiana, and Janis was, like weirdly jealous of him. Soul mates? Now your boyfriend, Ive known since kindergarten. Id nearly finished the pots when I smelt this most vile smell. Sell when you can; you are not for all markets. The moment their eyes met, they fell in love. 1969 Stars: Barbra Streisand, Walter Matthau, Michael Crawford, Marianne McAndrew Genre: Comedy, Musical, Romance Rating: G Runtime: 146 minutes They just don't make musicals like this any more. One of the peculiar things about Hello, Dolly! (to Kayleigh.) He drove a black Suzuki Vitara had five earrings and the word Fuck tattooed inside his lip. yonkers and new york city, the end of the 19th century, College/University, Community Theatre, High School, Professional Theatre, Religious Groups. This can be no trick. With music written by Jerry Herman, and Michael Stewart writing the book, 'Hello, Dolly!' was first performed on Broadway in 1964. She didnt think shed actually die, just found out that her boyfriend slept with someone else and she wanted to punish him by ending up in hospital and not letting him visit her for a bit. People used to throw firecrackers on my head in high school. Take a look at our library of free monologues . I say Youre going to get a girl, buddy, just maybe not your cousin, huh? And then I give him a friendly pat on the back. Back to square one. Hallie: Gathered. Hes not moving. --Rochelle O'Gorman Genre: Comedy, Musical, Romance Stars: Barbra Streisand, Walter Matthau, Michael Crawford, Marianne McAndrew Production: 20th Century Fox Won 3 Oscars. Whats my thanks? I mean, I know its not nice to have a bit of your stomach lining poking out, I get it, I do, but really how much more is there to say? (Banging on the floor with his fists. Care about you a lot, and that makes it superhard. But they wrote the most incredible, passionate letters every day, and they really made those two hours count. My wife left me. LEVI (Continued) AND A GIRL OVER SIX FOOT THREE LOVES A MAN WHO COME UP TO HER EAR, SURELY, IT'S OBVIOUS SHE'LL NEVER BE SEDUCED TIL SOME KIND SOUL CONDESCENDS TO GIVE HER BEAU A LITTLE BOOST! So lovely, that country in May. It used to seriously piss me off. I dont think so. I can see that now. Something Ive resurrected from that old trunk! The lead, Dolly Levi, was first played by Carol Channing. And I hardly know you! Ambrose Kemper: This doesn't concern her! Im nuts, you know, Im really crazy. I opened the caf with my friend Boo. Oh shit, maybe not. For she hath blessed and attractive eyes. Jesus, I nearly ran out of the place. Jerry Hermans energetic Hello, Dolly! Sue was kind of prude. A man loves the meat in his youth that he cannot endure in his age. And it may be the only chance Ill ever have to dance with a boy. Guess the news of the engagement came as a bit of a shock, huh? Because the fact is you are in a relationship. And maybe I can deal with your black soul better when Im older, but right now I cant handle it. Unrequited passion, of course. Then I realised that the smell was coming from the lounge room. And I cant be the only thing you like! Beatrix, the 17-year old president of the student body, after her ex-friend deviously cancels the prom. So I thought about it and realised that I had to treat it like a boxing match, get the first punch in, so to speak, to give me the upper hand in our relationship. Theres this man, Michael. Its a rite of passage as sacred as getting your drivers license or buying your first bra. (struggling) Do you remember when you found that picture in my car of you, me and Chet, with Chet cut out of it? Martin, I said. How was I to know he was about to die. Dont repeat that. Dolly Levi: Hello! . I try to imagine how hed notice me and fall hopelessly in love with me and all that. Can I be a dad or not? O, I am out of breath in this fond chase! Stay in bed, said mother, you have fever! but I just wouldnt. Even taking into account the fact that youre dead, really ask yourself, if I asked you straight off Im going to stuff you in this box now, would you rather be alive or dead? And so if the government could just get to the kitchen and re-arrange some things we could certainly party with Haitians. Listen to Jerry Herman's score, and dance around the living room when a sequined Streisand arrives in a club as Louis Armstrong strikes up the title tune for her benefit. Firecrackers, literally, not figuratively. And she says physical attraction is part of whats between them, and its her body. Like I didnt know until that moment just how much I wanted to be a father. Chris has taught music and has a master's degree in music education. Why were you talking to Janis Ian? Im not the kind of guy who spends hundreds on a last minute flight, back to New York, tears across town, then run up six flights of stairs and knocks on my best friends girlfriends door in order to run off and elope with her Thank God my parents are dead, this would have killed em! Because if you do, your parents will always know the unhappiness you feel for not being able to disappoint them. Hello Dolly: audition & callback sides Dolly Levi: An indefatigable, meddling matchmaker of strikingly dramatic appearance; opportunist, life-loving, strong stage presence. ''Hello, Dolly!'' She carries a bunch of jonquils the legend of her youth is nearly revived.). Research Playwrights, Librettists, Composers and Lyricists. And figure the reason they cant get the stuff, is because the Americans are stopping them. You want to know what Dad is like, right? Malaria fever and jonquils and then this boy. Because the fact is Im not the kind of guy who falls in love. Not everyone wants art that actually HURTS! Because I always swear. As by my faith, I see no more in you The one dark secret that will absolutely be the wedge that keeps us apart. And out of you she sees herself more proper Is he serious? .I'll give you the short one Oh Mrs. Molloy! Then her mom called my mom and was, like, yelling at her. I dont know how this happened. I empty the tube of jelly into the toilet, take my tube of muscle liniment, hold the two tubes nozzle to nozzle, and fill up the jelly tube with Tiger Balm. I mean, best in ages. One of those days. Wilder's uproarious farce about love and money, stars the irrepressible busybody, Dolly Gallagher Levi, who inspired the Broadway musical, Hello, Dolly! If you really want to know, married life sucks. The guy shes been working with. Its weird to say this, because in many ways Im already in so deep. Well, okay, um There were a few times that I couldve done that. You know what I mean? Sensitive. I mean, right? A cold hard fact. I mean Im fifteen and worried about every little thing, and Ive got this fucking sumo wrestler in a housecoat trailing behind me. He tells her he cant help himself. Or maybe get hit by a truck full of hot garbage juice, you know? Just give me five minutes of your time, Mr. Hackl, and I'll have you dancing in the streets. Hello, Dolly! Well, boy, oh, boy, what a racket! 2 Have a great winter, Im gonna go hump the fridge. Im gonna go for a 560, convertible, in gold, with leather interior, all the options. Girls were going to be in their bathing suits. I think. And Im dying to know Mom. Amen. IT'S MY DUTY TO ASSIST THE LORD ABOVE. Cornelius Hackl: Because I'm gonna light some candles under them. Book by MICHAEL STEWART Music and Lyrics by JERRY HERMAN Based on the play THE MATCHMAKER by Thornton Wilder Original Production Directed and Choreographed by Gower Champion Produced for the Broadway Stage by David Merrick and Champion-Five, Inc. TAMS-WITMARK MUSIC LIBRARY, INC. Im wearing a wedding dress that you picked out! Every evening for all these years I've put out the cat, I've locked the door, I've made myself a little rum toddy, and before I went to bed I said a prayer, thanking God that I was independent, that no one else's life was mixed up with mine. And who can hold their own in an interesting discussion. Sign up today to unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Just dont come any closer. I lost 75 pounds. Horace: Eighty percent of the people in the world are fools and the rest of us are in danger of contamination. I think youre ready to hear a little story about a girl named Megan who didnt have a very good time in high school. Like foggy south puffing with wind and rain? Monika: Oh, it was fine. Can I join you? I do know that I am, and I cant overcome it, I mean. Ill tell you what happens. One night I rounded them up, put them in a cage, doused them with Stuffed in a box like that, I mean youd be in there for ever. Stop! I said Im gonna go hump the fridge. I went and stood in a card shop for a bit to sort my head out. Styles havent changed so terribly much after all. Stop! So great. Its me. Im taking care of it. How about Duke Ellington, Ella Fitzgerald, Judy Garland, Liza Minelli, Marvin Gaye, Benny Goodman, and Frank Sinatra, among others. Your parents. You know, not everything has to be so goddamn IMPORTANT all the time! All right. One of my favorites is from ""Hello Dolly!" First performed on Broadway in 1964, it enjoyed a nearly 3000 show first run, was awarded 10 Tonys, and has seen numerous revivals both on and off Broadway. Picture this: Ive been through all the sitting, the waiting, spent three pounds thirty-nine on a mediocre sandwich, been wired up to a monitor, jogged, et cetera, Ive been jiggled about, prodded, pressed with some very chilly instruments, got released, finally, back into the world, with my clogged-up arteries and uncertain future, Im in the lift going down, who should I bump into? And thats not me. Barnaby Tucker: Holy cabooses, how do you know? Well maybe. Im outta here. All lacy with dogwood, literally flooded with jonquils! They just don't make musicals like this any more. I thought this isnt it, I have to breakup. Id been seeing him because of my Pyromania thats a person who likes lighting fires-but you probably know that being University educated. Like, if I blew her off to hang out with Kyle she would be like, Why didnt you call me back! Philip: The one who writes the plays, thats him, only now he writes them in Spain No, shes in Spain, too, theyre all in Spain, theres no one here Am I in Spain? Isnt that the most pathetic thing youve ever heard? What gives him the right? Knock-knock. All right, Ill hold them myself And then I (She stops in front of the picture.) So what Im thinking is Oh man, this is so brilliant, its scary. While I was institutionalized, my brain was studied exhaustively in the guise of mental health. Jerry Herman's energetic Hello, Dolly! Then, using the computer model, they generated every thought I could possibly have in the next, say ten years, which they then filtered through a probability matrix to determine everything I was going to do in that period. The New York Daily News wrote: 'I wouldn't say that Jerry Herman's score is memorable.' Other important songs include: Put On Your Sunday Clothes, Ribbons Down My Back and Before the Parade Passes By. If so, my eyes are oftener washd than hers. And thank God we didnt have any children. Or wasted? I definitely caved in to the peer pressure. If you are reading a monologue below and feel excited to get up and have a play that is your monologue. After I wait for you! Im all walking like Ive got a paintbrush up my arse, thinking: Here is The Complete PDF Library She accidentally killed herself. Why, what means this? In fact, we have to trust the playwright or screenwriter and just fully commit to the situation. I will also end statements with a question mark? Irene Molloy: If you ask me, she'd do better with a heavy veil. No, the world must be peopled. Ive been at the hospital, Kayleigh. Who knew those would be the magic words? Determined to marry wealthy Walter Matthau, she lures him out of Yonkers and sets about wooing him. I see no more in you than in the ordinary Answer (1 of 2): One of my favorites is from ""Hello Dolly!" The stage production, not the movie. He discovers that I was this really fascinating woman all along. James: Kim: I did. Hunted. But then one of the other doctors popped in, called him Nigel, mentioned something about badminton so I thought: probably not. Is he crazy? Cry the man mercy; love him; take his offer: They all stare, mesmerized, at the strutting JEFFREY. Meg bought me this T-shirt at the Warner Brothers store, and its got a picture of Superman on it. Even if we have to go with our cousin, or our gay best friend from tap class, we will have a Prom. No, Im not in Spain, dear. Evenings, dances ! New York, NY, SM for Poor Yella Rednecks Okay So, I love you so much, like to the end of the world and back, butsometimes I love you like I feel sorry for a monkey. Its not you. So, hey, Lise you wanna go see Judas Priest at Nassau Coliseum? Some feeling? Each month we work on scenes and monologues with a beautiful, supportive, inspiring group of actors. Youre sorry?! is that, beyond the title song, there aren't any other truly standout songs. Make sure you have everything. If you say vampire I'll scream! Dolly Levi: Yonkers, New York, to handle a highly personal matter for Mr. Horace Vandergelder, the well-known, unmarried, half-a-millionaire. Have I told you how Martin died? I'm feeling an updraft in my underpants! STANDS4 LLC, 2023. And why, I pray you? All rights reserved. This isnt working! And in conclusion, may I remind you that it doesnt say R.S.V.P. on the Statue of Liberty. Its my Achilles flaw or something. Sister Winnie: Look at me, Ma, I made it! I know you look at me now and think, boy she must have breezed through high school. How come Judy Rude lost out to Molly Blah? If Id known Naomi felt like that I wouldve broken it off with her months ago. The consultant basically said I could pop my clogs at any moment. Louis Armstrong's "Hello, Dolly!". Are you mad? I wanna thank all of you for a terrific summer. Im just, I feel that we should maybe stop before we get too far. She says, Surely you must have noticed? But that was the thing. As youll see from some of the monologues on this list, some are simply just lighter in nature. After I base my entire concept of self-esteem on the fact that youre willing to marry me! They used to try to blow me up. She took a giant shit on my face. The talking-talking-talking-Jesus-Christ-wont-he-ever-shut-up titanic self-absorption of the man! That make the world full of ill-favourd children: Was I free? Ever. Look, sex and love are separate thingsWell, they can be, thats all Im saying. So that ruined the mood. Know why, you pathetically ineffectual and pusillanimous pretend-friend-to-animals?! It was a separate arrangement. It was the fault of the psychiatrist. She looked at it, and then she looked at him. Never have. Don't worry about the lack of a solid story or Gene Kelly's pedestrian direction. Picnics. Way under list price, payments deducted from my check. No, faith, proud mistress, hope not after it: Dolly Levi: No man does, Horace, no man does. I know, right? I mean, hes just laying out there. Hello Dolly- Monologue 1 Term 1 / 11 1st line Click the card to flip Definition 1 / 11 Oh dear, oh my, will you look at that, ten o'clock and the shop's not opened yet Click the card to flip Flashcards Learn Test Match Created by Terms in this set (11) 1st line Oh dear, oh my, will you look at that, ten o'clock and the shop's not opened yet New York, NY, Escape To Margaritaville Rosencrantz: No. 'Hello, Dolly!' Where: Hollywood Pantages Theatre, 6233 Hollywood Blvd, Los Angeles When: 8 p.m. Tuesdays-Friday, 2 and 8 p.m. Saturdays, 1 and 6:30 p.m. Sundays; ends Feb. 17 Tickets: $35 and. Her love interest is Horace Vandergelder, who owns a feed store and is a half-a-millionaire. Like is there a way of findin out whether Im fertile or not? So he tells me theres a sperm analysis test that I can do if I really want to. And thank heaven, fasting, for a good mans love: I really like you I dont really agree with most of your opinionsbut I dont meet a lot of people who can actually make me think, you know? It is a key ingredient to a happy and meaningful life. If requested, here are a few audition monologues for Hello, Dolly! For I must tell you friendly in your ear, And I guess I am. Now you listen and listen good. Hello, Dolly! And youre sorry! Helen things are so tricky, life is. I loved you and believed you and pretended not to notice the Streisand thing. Prom is short for Promenade, a slow, gentle walk through a shady glen, and this beloved ceremony symbolizes our journey from the shadows of adolescence to the bright sunshine of the adult world with all its freedoms. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Always the same, isnt it. I think we should switch places. One day, I was reading some Shakespeare and realized I dont really love this person It was one of the sonnets. Another 1 win & 13 nominations. I embellished a little. Its like hes confused about how attractive I am he cant quite believe it. Enrolling in a course lets you earn progress by passing quizzes and exams. Well, all power to George W I dont want the fucking pricks to win, either. Dolly Levi: Goodness, the whole room is crawling with men. There are some who would be grateful for that--the plot is but a flimsy excuse to string together song and dance numbers. WHY WASNT I GOOD ENOUGH TO WANT TO IMPREGNATE? One year later, she went back for a second interview. Is there oh any other time you might have told me this! I highlighted my hair because you said I needed shimmer. I went in and there was Martin sitting bolt upright in his chair with his nostrils quivering and the most terrible look on his face. You foolish shepherd, wherefore do you follow her, That can entame my spirits to your worship. I mean: not fine fine everythings. Every time I think Im over the hump, Ill have a dream or Ill see some girl who looks like her from the back. Dolly Levi: And on those cold winter nights, Horace, you can snuggle up to your cash register. (She raises her skirt and does a mincing step around the room. Zelda: We have put together a massive list of comedy monologues for men and women, from theatre, film and TV. Brandon: School school school school school. I see the tube of diaphragm jelly lying next to the sink. Theyve showered me with leaflets.

Inside The Digestive System Newsela Answer Key, 40 Days After Death In Islam Hanafi, Catawba County Vehicle Tax Bill Search, Articles H